Quote On Worrying

To worry about what you don't have is to waste what you do have. - Unknown

Exercise For The Neck

Doctor advises patients to exercise their neck by just reading this message

In the end, all patients go home happily without asking the doctor for any medications.
It is effective, said the doctor. "All my patients never come back to me again".

Check Your Children Homework

Why parents should always check their children's homework before they hand it in:

A first grade girl handed in the drawing below for a homework assignment.

After it was graded and the child brought it home, she returned to school the next day with the following note:

Dear Ms. Davis,
I want to be very clear on my child's illustration. It is NOT of me on a dance pole on a stage in a strip joint. I work at Home Depot and had commented to my daughter how much money we made in the recent snowstorm.

This picture is of me selling a shovel.

Mrs. Harrington

No Running In The House

How many times have we been told...and have told our children... NOT to run in the house? Did we always listen? Do they listen? Not always.

Sometimes our seemingly futile efforts fail, and 'boo-boo's' happen. Here is a little guy who didn't listen, and he got his own souvenir scars.

Perhaps he'll learn from his mistake. Maybe.....

Doesn't look too bad. But perhaps he should keep this next photo handy to explain the way it happened!......

What Countries Stand For

H.O.L.L.A.N.D
Hope Our Love Lasts And Never Dies

I.T.A.L.Y
I Trust And Love You

L.I.B.Y.A
Love Is Beautiful; You Also

F.R.A.N.C.E
Friendships Remain And Never Can End

C.H.I.N.A.
Come Here..... I Need Affection

B.U.R.M.A.
Between Us, Remember Me Always

N.E.P.A.L.
Never Ever Part As Lovers

I.N.D.I.A.
I Nearly Died In Adoration

K.E.N.Y.A
Keep Everything Nice, Yet Arousing

C.A.N.A.D.A.
Cute And Naughty Action that Developed into Attraction

K.O.R.E.A.
Keep Optimistic Regardless of Every Adversity

E.G.Y.P.T.
Everything's Great, You Pretty Thing !

M.A.N.I.L.A.
May All Nights Inspire Love Always

T.H.A.I.L.A.N.D.
Totally Happy, Always In Love And Never Dull

Indonesian Obama

There's a Obama lookalike in Indonesia and he is celebrating too.

Suicide Line

Last night I was depressed so I called S.O.S (thats the suicide prevention helpline).
My call got diverted to a call center in Pakistan.
Told them I was suicidal.
They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

Is This An Alien?

I do not know whether these pictures are genuine or not. It is supposedly a creature found somewhere in Malaysia. Could it be an alien or genie???

Reading Email Privately

If you want your manager not to see your personal mails, there is only one way to check your mail.

Never Argue With A Woman

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")

"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her "I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading"

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"For reading a book," she replies,

"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her again,

"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading"

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with Sexual assault," says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.